Spelling Bee days

January 10, 2009

Well, yesterday was the day of my daughter’s Spelling Bee debut.  A few thoughts:

1. She told me yesterday morning that Bethany was going to win because “whenever we have a practice Bee, Bethany always wins.”
2. Bethany didn’t win.
3. And did I know that “whoever wins is going to get A TROPHY!?!?!”
4. No, I did not know that.
5. Winning a trophy to my daughter would be like a sailor finally getting an answer to his S.O.S. after being lost at sea for 2 months.  It would give her reason to live. (OK, so I exaggerate.  Slightly.)
6. Is it just me or are kids not spelling as well as they did in “the olden days” (i.e. the 70′s & 80′s)?  Because I’m pretty sure I knew how to spell “lemon” and “puzzle” in third grade.  And I don’t remember winning any awards for it.
7. The longest word called was “bandersnatch.”
8. It was called for my daughter.
9. I chuckled at the collective gasps which arose from the 2nd, 3rd and 4th-grade onlookers when a tricky word was given.
10. “Bandersnatch” garnered the loudest gasp of all.
11. She spelled it right.
12. She was now in 3rd place.
13. And then she got “cotton.”
14. And spelled it “c-o-t-t-e-n.”
15. The little bell rang and 3rd place is where she finished.
16. Oh the loss of that trophy.
17. She was devastated.

Few things are more painful to me than when one of my children is in pain–and oh how my heart ached with hers–but I was so thankful God chose it to end the way it did because the ensuing conversation provided another opportunity to express:

1. that her worth doesn’t come from what she does but because of who she is.
2. that her dad & I love her exactly the same, trophy or not.
3. that our first question will seldom be “Did you win?” or “What grade did you get?” but instead, “Did you do your best?”  Because if she did, we don’t care what the results are.
4. that she is an Andrews, and Andrewses exhibit good sportsmanship and are congratulatory & kind to our competitors…even when our competitors accomplish that which we wished we had accomplished ourselves.
5. that it’s OK to be angry & disappointed, but our expression of it should be done appropriately.
6. that sometimes she’ll make careless mistakes (c-o-t-t-e-n), like all of us, but it’s not the end of the world, just a reminder that being careful is generally a good thing.  (And I don’t think she’ll ever misspell “cotton” again in her life. )
7. that I know exactly how she feels because when I was in high school, I played basketball for three years and during those three years we played our rival school countless times and every time I was determined to win and every time we decidedly lost.  Every. time.  She is not alone.

Yep, for me, for today, I think 3rd place was a huge win.

Related posts:

1. School days
2. Oh the innocence
3. A fine mothering moment
4. It’s the Little Things
5. He must have inherited his grandfather’s sense of humor

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