Dumb Thing #1

January 9, 2006

In keeping with my melancholy, the-glass-is-basically-empty outlook on life, I’ve decided to add a new category to this site called “Dumb Things.” This new category will give me a place to post my thoughts about things in life that I think are dumb and/or things that make me want to scratch my eyeballs out. I have a feeling the majority of the “Dumb Things” will be my own…because I do a lot of dumb things. Speaking of which…I thought I’d kick this new project off with a real doozy—something I did of which I am hardly proud. In fact, I actually feel quite a bit of shame about it and it’s giving me way too much stress, but my hope is that someone out there might be inspired or encouraged as I work my own stuff out.

Before I begin, though, I feel compelled to address a few administrative items. First, there are a few people who love me dearly (and I them) for which the idea of my blogging about personal things makes them slightly uncomfortable. Well, whereas you felt a little uncomfortable before, reading this post just might make you break out in hives. Just thought I’d warn you. Second, I’m no expert on the subject on which I’m about to embark—I’m not trying to offer advice to anyone else, I’m simply chronicling my own journey. In other words, in the off-chance you decide to do anything as a result of what you read here and it turns out badly, don’t sue me.

Right. Let’s get on with it.

We are about $25,000 in the hole (not including our mortgage) and I’m feeling convicted. The majority of that debt is in student loans and the rest (nearly $8000 of it) is on our credit card. I’m not feeling very good about this situation so I’ve decided it’s time to tackle this monster and get this monkey off our backs.

I’m going to offer a little explanation about how we got here, not to make excuses, but because there are some major lessons I’ve learned in the process.

Our student loans, totaling approximately $17,000, are a result of 1) me studying abroad in Israel for 8 months as an undergraduate and 2) Brian going to seminary. (The fact that seminary cost so darn much is something I find quite ironic since he graduated with a B.S. at UCLA and an M.S. at Stanford—both in Aerospace Engineering—owing not one penny to anyone. On the other hand, he goes to seminary and we’ve gotta pay through the nose. We laugh every once in a while about what he could be making had he stayed in A.E., but we’ve never seriously entertained going back. He was made to be a pastor. But I digress…)

So, we’ve got student loans and I’d have to say I’d accumulate both of those loans all over again if I had to go back. Israel was one of the most life-changing experiences for me and seminary was a great investment for Brian.

But now the issue of the credit card debt. This is Dumb Thing #1. The credit card debt is mainly my doing. About a year ago, I had the idea to start an online business. I won’t go into all the details because they really aren’t that exciting and I wouldn’t want to bore you. Suffice it to say, I ran out of steam and the business is now defunct. There are plenty of people who’ve started businesses without going into debt, but alas I was not one of them.

Anyway, to my credit (if I may be so bold and no pun intended), all of this spending took place with Brian’s full knowledge. I had his blessing to pursue this business idea. We even prayed about it and both agreed that God seemed to be giving the go-ahead. I’m still sorting this out, like, did we hear God wrong, did we not pray hard or long enough or did God, in fact, allow us to go ahead, knowing full well that the business would fail but realizing that we’d be all the better for it in the long run. It’s a complex issue, but as of this moment I’m inclined to believe we did get the go-ahead from God. Just because the outcome wasn’t good (as defined by ourselves and the world) doesn’t mean it wasn’t good for us.

So that’s the situation. The questions at this point are:

  1. What can I learn about the past so this doesn’t happen again?
  2. What can I do to fix it?

I’ll attempt to answer these two questions over the next several days. In my next post I’ll reveal the key to my dumbness (as seemingly unrelated as it is) and then hopefully I’ll come up with a solid plan to deal with the debt…on a pastor’s salary. Now won’t that be fun.

Category: Dumb Things

Comments

7 Responses to “Dumb Thing #1”

  1. Lisa
    January 10th, 2006 @ 12:38 am

    I have no advice to offer you, simply because I would feel like a hypocrite to give you any. However, I am going to add you and your husband to my prayer list. I know how stressful figuring out the budget can be. My husband is a pastor, and I just left a very nice salary and benefits to have more time with my son, and to work at the church with my husband during the week. We both have school bills, medical bills, and some credit card debt. The good news is that we just paid my husband’s school loan down to $2000, and mine to $4000! I was having a discussion with my husband today that sounded very much like your blog entry. I told him how I feel convicted for owing anyone anything, and how I’m working on getting us debt free. I’m sure that you are doing similar things as I am, so I won’t bore you with what I’m doing to save money, but I will tell you that you can do it, and that I will be praying for you daily. I will pray for favor, wisdom, and peace.

  2. caroline
    January 10th, 2006 @ 10:39 am

    $25,000 ? A drop in the bucket for us, but I won’t get into specifics.

    Just last night my husband was telling me about another church in our state that is starting a building project. No problem he was told … it’s an affluent suburb and a member with a net worth of over 4 billion. My 12 year old daughter asked what net worth is.

    “Well, it’s if you sold everything you own … houses, land, everything and counted up all the money. We’d be worth about $125,000,” my hubby said.

    I just look at him and say, “It’s what you have minus your debt.”

    “Oh, yah right.” He turns to our daughter. “We’re not worth anything. In fact we’re actually worth more alive then dead.”

    Now how many people can say that ;o) God help us, we’re such goobers.

  3. Maiju
    January 10th, 2006 @ 11:45 am

    “Just because the outcome wasn’t good (as defined by ourselves and the world) doesn’t mean it wasn’t good for us.”

    Amen to that! it’s so easy to stuck into the situation we are that we loose our focuss to God and to the fact that He’ll turn every thing good for us. Like the israelities couldn’t see the outcome of the desert time I tend to loose my faith and build my own cows. You’ll find the solution, I know! God hasn’t abondoned you!

    Israel has it’s way to overwhelme. We toured there 3 weeks with my hysband twelve years ago and specially Jerusalem was something!

    We also have a lot of loan because of the year in United States but i wouödn’t change it because that has been one of the most important years to me. i wish i could come back to States some day.

  4. Amy
    January 10th, 2006 @ 1:15 pm

    Lisa, thank you, thank you…for your encouragement and mostly for your prayers! I. RECEIVE. IT! :) (And congratulations on the student loan paydowns.)

    Caroline…and isn’t that the truth? That we are on earth dealing with this sort of thing only temporarily and what freedom we will have once we get to heaven! I had a friend once who said that if we really knew what heaven was like, we’d all commit suicide to get there faster.

    Maiju, I agree. I am the queen of losing focus.

  5. Tracey
    January 10th, 2006 @ 1:32 pm

    Amy, I’m hearin’ ya…my husband is a campus minister but would have been a chemical engineer (but if he’d taken that route chances are I never would have met him!). It’s my student loans that are on our backs, but we’ve whittled one of them (started at over $22,500 in the year 2000) down to — well, our last payment will be next month, woohoo! The other is still at about $20,000 (oh yeah, there’s another) and we have a plan for that as well. It’s a long road, but you just gotta keep plugging along. Of course, I can say all of this now since our first child will not be here until the end of May, Lord willing, so I don’t know the stress of dealing with all the debt PLUS small children. God bless, and thanks for sharing.

  6. Amy
    January 10th, 2006 @ 4:00 pm

    Tracey, $22,500 in 5-6 years. Check you out! That’s awesome. Gives me hope.

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